On Making Things
One of the ways I think art school kind of ruined me is that it got me into the mindset that if I’m going to make something, it has to be something other people will like, because making stuff that I like is not interesting. And that's not just some internal self-doubt thing, I actually learned early on that whenever I made stuff I liked or enjoyed, it did not do well in critique, so I basically spent the next four years trying to work to other people's tastes. And it stuck.
I’m not usually one for self-improvement endeavors, but this is something I'd really like to get over. There are so many projects I'd like to work on and hobbies I'd like to participate it, but I always get nerfed by the thought of "yeah, but who wants to see another one of those?"
Like photography. I like messing with cameras and I'd love to get better at the technical aspects of it, but I get stuck on finding things to take pictures of because I'm always doubting whether the subject is "interesting" enough.
Or this blog. I write little thoughts and notes out to myself all the time, but I never publish anything because I convince myself that there's no point in publishing stuff unless other people would want to read it.
I need to keep reminding myself that it's okay to make stuff that's not very interesting or remarkable to anyone else, as long as I enjoy it. Everything is ultimately like knitting or crocheting: Have thousands of people made hats before? Yeah, but I just made this one for me, I had fun doing it, and I'm pleased with the end product, so it doesn't matter if anyone else really likes it or not.